18 Beautiful People

(C) CBS, 2011.


I look at this picture taken Day 1, the day we first sat on those rafts and rowed in as tribes to play the game of Survivor South Pacific, and I think, "WOW, we have been through a lot."


Once strangers, then tribemates. 


Sometimes enemies, but most often, family and friends.


It's incredible how much 18 people can endure in just 39 days.


I'd say these 39 days are equivalent to 5 years of learning in "real life."


I've learned so much. I think I've grown so much.


And yet, I still have so much to learn.


For example, as I watched Cochran leave the game last night, I felt so sad. 


Cochran was a close friend of mine in the game. I felt connected to him. We shared a lot. 


And when I made the decision not to flip at the merge, I did so, because it was the best game-play for me/our tribe, in my opinion. 


But, I always understood Cochran's reason for flipping. I may not have liked it, but I understood it. 


And I always cared for Cochran--even after he flipped.


BUT, in the few days before I was voted out of the game, Cochran really did ignore me. He didn't feel the same responsibility to me that I felt to him.


And ... last night's episode reminded me of that all--those days in the game when I felt so alone.


I don't know if you ever feel this way in life, but as I watched last night's episode, I thought, "I was a good friend to you--and you did not reciprocate." (Picture me with my hands on my hips as I say that. Ha ha ha.)


8(


Is that hilarious?

I'm 41 and I'm upset that a friend I made in a game called "Outwit, Outplay, Outlast" didn't treat me NICELY.


Someone, slap me.


I have so much to more to learn.


Because as I watch the show each week, I see things about myself that I like. And I see things about myself that make me cringe.




(C) CBS, Monty Brinton, 2011.


But more than anything ...


I see how human we all are. 


I see how ALL of us have that kind of depth--good and "not-so-good" parts.


And while it is somewhat painful to re-live the game at times--it is SOOO good to see yourself from a different perspective. To see yourself the way others may see you.


Because we all have beautiful in us.


But, we all make mistakes.


And in the end, we all need to learn to forgive and to be forgiven.


To me, it's the greatest lesson Survivor teaches.


And the hardest lesson to learn.


Well, that's probably too much reflection for one morning. (I know, I'm not Life Coach, but I do play one on this blog. Ha ha ha.)


Thanks for listening (and helping me work through the experience).


Until tomorrow ... sending smiles.




18 16 beautiful people: Survivor South Pacific
(Just realized the returning players aren't in this--what the what?)


(C) CBS, 2011.




****
PS: 



If you watch Cochran's Ponderosa entrance, this entry may make more sense (on CBS.com)

Me--Dawn--who loved Cochran the whole game am kind of snippy with him. I'm hurt. 


And I really show my hurt--which isn't like me. 


Usually, I let things go OR I hold back from saying anything. 


BUT, Cochran hurt me at the end of the game (he really did ignore me on my most lonely period in the game). And you'll see how I felt about that in the Ponderosa clips. 


Funny, it's not his gameplay that hurt me in the end, it was his lack of concern for me as a person/human that did me in.


Dawn Gets Cranky: Cochran at Ponderosa:
http://www.cbs.com/shows/survivor/video/2174517275/survivor-south-pacific-ponderosa-cochran-pt-1



***
PPS: 


JC and I are good friends now--because we've both apologized and we've both forgiven.


Which is pretty powerful to me. I know it may sound cliche', but forgiveness really does restore things.


I hope I remember this lesson.  (Because I'm guessing life is going to present me with a few more opportunities to practice forgiveness. Of myself and of others.)



***

PPPS:


Here are two more interviews with Whitney/myself post-game:


TV Guide/Canada:
http://tvguide.ca/realitytv/articles/111207_survivor_exit_gd.htm


The Block Radio
http://www.theblockradio.com/tag/dawn-meehan-survivor-cast-off/



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